Imagine a weather forecaster called Phil foretold of stormy, windy weather ahead. . You'd have social media philled (sic) with some asking what could a Fenian from Donegal ever know about the weather, while producing their own convoluted analysis of the weather chart explaining how the dark clouds on display were just rays of sunshine photoshopped by Phil to look like clouds. Jabba would hold a press conference where he'd be seen chiding his stenographic offspring running around all unruly in their Warbutton-esque short trousers, instructing them to write that every brick holding up Ibrox has been assaulted by invisible Hibs players undetected by live CCTV.
